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Archive for October, 2013

For centuries we have been globally dominated by a patriarch wielding a sword of fear to hold its position. You may have heard the prophecies or simply looked at the world around us to know the feminine is rising from her shackles. These are times of great evolutionary change as we move from a pervasive patriarch dominating our consciousness to a remembering of the force of our feminine. Balance of our feminine and masculine nature is fundamental to bring balance to the planet on which we live.

5250290181_burka_1434466c_xlargeThis domination has taken deep root in our psyche and is obvious when we see the rights of women publicly thwarted the world over through culture, religion, politics and law. Yet for those of us who may believe we are liberated from oppression, myself included, this insidious weight shackles the voice of our feminine in covert shadows beyond the bounds of our own awareness.

I did not expect the weight of this oppression to reveal itself while making love to a man I trust. After a climax of intense pleasure an ache to feel my beloved deep inside was met with his command that he was going to make me wait for him. This made me want him even more. Slowly he began to enter and once inside he could not hold back from thrusting deeper. He seemed precipitously close to getting off. My throat choked in disappointment. He said he was going to wait. Now I wasn’t so sure. I numbed my heart and silently waited for him to have his way. He pulled out, delaying his own gratification, to let me know I was worth waiting for.

His unexpected action seemed to release eons of emotions. What began to crystallize through the tears was a feeling of being used by men to satisfy their own needs. His act of pulling out meant I was more than just a body to gratify his own physical urgency. It was a deep bow to the Goddess in a way I had never felt before.

This awareness of being used by men resided deep within me as a collective knowing. Somewhere in our cellular memory a woman knows what it feels like to be used, manipulated, oppressed, violated, whether it is ripe in her consciousness or not. And what was more painful than being used was what lay beneath.

For in order to be used I had to deem myself worthless. My needs held less value than the love or security of a man. The voice of my own feminine held less power than that of the masculine. To sacrifice our soul for a misaligned belief is painful. The revelation in my bedroom seemed to open the doorway for another feminine voice to unleash itself a few days later.

A patient I work with has COPD (chronic obstructive pulmonary disease). After being hit with a second bout of pneumonia I had her sit forward, propped on pillows to work the muscles in and around her shoulders stressed by the very act of breathing.

“Why does this pain on the left side of my neck nag me all the time?” she asked.

She had no idea what a big question she was asking. I could feel her bitter heart twisted in pain. I knew much of her pain had to do with the relationship of her own feminine and masculine energies. How could I language what I felt in order to answer her question? At 68 years old what was she ready to “see”?

“Has there ever been a man in your life you felt you could completely count on?” I asked her.

“Never. I have felt more like a slave.”

She began to recount stories of relationships, including one marriage, that felt more like prison sentences than partnerships.

“Nobody taught me anything about life. When I got married I didn’t know what to expect. I had no idea sex was part of it. I didn’t even know how you got pregnant. t had to figure everything out myself.

Every man I was ever with wanted me to wake up at 5 am to make coffee and get his breakfast ready. I was never allowed to sleep in. While he relaxed it was my job to clean up. Every meal was like this. Me fixing the food. Waiting on him. Cleaning up while he rested. I wasn’t allowed to watch television. I could never do anything I wanted to do. Every day I had work to do. I had to paint, fix up the house, keep everything clean. One man had a camper he used for hunting. I would not be allowed out until I cleaned up the whole thing for him. Blow jobs were expected whenever he wanted them. Sex always made me feel dirty.

I still think about relationships. I would like to have someone to be affectionate with but I have gotten so bitter. It’s just not worth it. When I see young women catering to men I tell them to stand up for themselves. I try to help them.”

UnknownNot every situation is so extreme. And women the world over are subjected to much deeper abuse and oppression. Whatever the level of suffering, whether obvious or hidden, the stories unravel to the same thread of powerlessness. It insidiously weaves the collective matrix of the feminine through personal threads of oppression. How the feminine has been held within us is how we have held the collective feminine around us. We are part of, therefore, cannot be separate from, this collective wounding.

I was not sure what would happen when I opened this conversation yet I stood in awe at her understanding and awareness. I honored her courage to share and her strength to endure. For the first time she felt heard.

There is much more work to be done but from what I see we are waking up I told her. Every time you stand up for yourself you are influencing your circle of the world to wake up.

She beat herself up for not seeing things sooner. I don’t know if we were ready for this conversation sooner. But one thing is certain. We are ready now.

Of course the answer does not lie in a bitter heart. The solution is not to cut yourself off from relationships to save yourself from pain. She knows the work is in learning to love herself. She learned this she said from watching TV.

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By making love a human life is conceived. For us mere mortals creation does not get more omnipotent than that!

An egg and sperm unite and our physical being begins to form yet we are also beings of light. There is a merging of light that happens at the moment of conception as well.

One of the things we learn from the shamans of the Andes on our women’s journey to Peru are the teachings on Light. And none is more powerful than the Light of creation.

For women, a silver cord of light runs through the central channel of our body. For men it is gold. As we merge with our lovers our bodies become full of light. During orgasm, an alchemy of silver and gold creates violet, the light of creation. At this moment we are elevated to God and Goddess in a sacred and powerful dance of creation.

When we understand creation at this dimension of light we hold the power to birth not just human life but our dreams, our visions, our destiny, through this sacred alchemy.

So how do we remember the Gods and Goddesses we are? How can our lovemaking be a portal to our visions?

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Your beloved is the most magnificent mirror you have. As you sit across from each other, begin by looking, really looking into the eyes of your lover. Know all that you see, all that you feel is a reflection of the Divine. Allow your heart to hold everything that arises. See and be seen. Love is a lover of all that is be it sorrow, bliss. pleasure, pain.

Let your breath sync, jaw soft, mouth open, in and out together.

Each partner take a turn slowly circling your fingertips, ever so lightly, around the nipples of your partner, building up the sexual energy. Once your partner begins to feel aroused draw that energy down the front of their body in slow circles from the nipples to the genitals. Place your hand over their sex organs and hold still as you continue to gaze and breathe.

As you hold your partners genitals, let them know how much you appreciate them in your life. Let them know what you love most about them. Now let your partner take their turn with you.

Let this ritual be an offering of your heart to your lover and to the Divine. Let this be a time to set an intention to love more deeply. To open your heart wider than ever before. To give and receive pleasure in ways never before imagined.

Let your lovemaking be an offering. Let your love ripple in waves to reach those you love. Let your love be offered to heal those in need. Let the love you generate be of benefit to the world.

I asked my beloved to write a prayer for this piece. His prayers take me straight to God. I offer this as an invocation or as inspiration for lovemaking. A prayer to remember the divine God and Goddess you are. To call upon the power of creation through the sacred dance of your holy union each time you make love.

There is only One.
One Power. One Being. One Source….right here, right now.
Existing within us….through us…as us.
Thank you Great Spirit.
Thank you for this gift of life.
Thank you for the breath we breathe.
Thank you for our heartbeat…one heartbeat.
Thank you for eyes that see, and hands that touch.
Great Spirit, Spirit of the Universe. Use us…use us a channel of your Peace, your Love, and your Light.
Let your breath be our breath.
Let your heartbeat be our heartbeat.
Let your eyes be our eyes.
Let your hand be our hands.
Let your words be our words.
Let there be peace.
Let the peace in our hearts be the peace of the world.
Let there be love.
May the love in our hearts be the love of the world.
Let there be light.
May the light in our eyes be the light of the world.
by Don Black Feather

You are a God and a Goddess. There is no better place to awaken that than in the bedroom.

(Please note…the teachings on light from Dona Aleja, altomesayok and master Q’ero shaman also include teachings of same sex relationships. LBGT are of two spirits and have both silver and gold within making them, in the words of Dona Aleja, special. Many spiritual traditions recognize gay men and women as “two spirits” and they are highly respected and revered. Dona Aleja also says it is important that women know these teachings of light. Women create life, past the age of conception. We must teach women to have this knowledge of light in the moment of creation. Women are the givers of life so they can help to change the world.)

(On another note, the above touch ritual is adapted from “The Nine Flowers Meditation” by Mantak Chia)

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PRAYER FROM THE NEW MOON DESPACHO

You may add a prayer at any time to the despacho
by holding it silently, speaking it out loud or writing or posting here.

We bow before you, Pachamama,
with open and humble hearts.

We bow to the Apus, to Spirit, to Creator
to offer our gratitude. 

To thank you for your unconditional and unwavering presence
when we are unable to see. 

To thank you for holding us when we are lost. 
Help us to align with your divine guidance
so we may step once again into our wholeness. 

May we drink from the source of your nectar
so our hearts are fed in joy.

May we remember that we are children of this Universe.
May we awaken our innocence, our delight,
our wonder in this world in which we live.

We thank you for hearing our prayers,
for the blessings you bestow. 

We thank you for your healing graces that wash us clean.
May we learn to trust in the mystery of your divine order.
We surrender our sorrows, our heartaches, our worries and fears.
We thank you for transforming these seeds of doubt
so they may lay the fertile ground on which we walk
illuminating the pathway for us to follow. 

We thank you, thank you, thank you with all our hearts. 

despachocollage

AHO ~  Namaste ~  Blessings ~  Amen ~ OM

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